I thought you'd all like to be the first* to know (if, collectively, you can be "first") that the Sage has arrived safely home, after a long round trip. He is very pleased with the vesta case he bought at an auction *somewhere in Gloucestershire*. "How much did it cost you?" I asked pleasantly. "Worth every penny of *£ quite a lot*, he declared. "I daresay," I replied, "but that wasn't exactly what I asked."
It took some asking of the specific questions, but he finally did tell me (*£ quite a lot* had been the hammer price, with the auctioneer's premium on top) but it's up to him, I'd only asked, he's welcome to buy whatever he likes. Not that he does, mostly, he has simple tastes, except in women.
I woke up this morning at 6 o'clock and lay very still, so as not to disturb him - and then, of course, when a discreetly extended foot found an empty bed, remembered that he wasn't here. I've never lived alone, you know. In the old-fashioned way, I left home to get married and have been there ever since.
*At the time of writing, you were the first. However, since then, I've had a long chat with Weeza so now she knows too. Mind you, she didn't know he'd gone away in the first place.