Z expands

 As the header says, the blog party will be on 16th August.  As always, guests are welcome to stay, the more people here, the happier `I am.  How chaotic the house will be is uncertain, but no one comes here expecting any sort of tidiness and it'll just be wilder than usual.  

My children telling me that I shouldn't worry about moving, but prepare the house for the long term has taken away a pressure that I didn't know I felt.  I'm planning to use the whole house, in a way I don't usually.  When you've got more bedrooms than you need to sleep in, you tend to shut them up.  But why should I?  So I'm moving more bookcases into the furthest bedroom and I'll also move Tim's big tv and hifi system there and it'll be given a new purpose.  It'll make room in the study, which will be another dining room too.  That'll make three.  It's ideal for the mornings as it faces east and south.  It will also be something of a kitchen extension and still be a study, so it's just a room for me to eat breakfast and lunch in - the reason my children realise there's little chance of me downsizing is becoming clear.

It's not that I have any objection to moving somewhere smaller, it's just that nothing suitable is ever built.  People want somewhere big enough for their nicest furniture and they don't want steep staircases and they do want some privacy.  They want at least one spare room, a study, a dining room and storage space.  But people who have a family and are looking to upsize want the same thing.  Starter homes are not suitable for people preparing for old age.  Narrow cloakroom that there's no chance of getting into with a walking frame, a narrow, steep staircase that's dangerous to come down, with no space for a stairlift and the bathroom never has a shower that an old person can use, not if they need a chair or someone to help them.  The retirement complexes that are built are certainly usable and I've got friends who are very happy there, but they're a nightmare to sell, if the owner needs care or dies, and huge service charges are payable, even if no one is living there.  Not that it would suit me, at any age.  But anyway, I'm planning to spread out right here.

Z cracks on

 Right up until the day before I planning to leave, I intended to go to Wales.  But I hadn't contacted the people I'd meant to call on, so I knew that my heart wasn't in it, as I said in the previous post.  If I'd gone to Scotland, I'd have had my laptop and wifi, but I wouldn't have any internet in Wales, apart from occasionally on my phone.  I wouldn't get anything done and I really couldn't spare the time, though I wanted to go.  Then, on the night before I was due to leave, I felt faint again - in the bathroom as I was getting ready for bed.  I managed to sit down (on the toilet, not the floor) and I think I did faint, though I didn't fall.  It was the soan papdi that did it.  It's so delicious.  I had opened a box (that I'd had for ages and it needed to be used, I convinced myself).  I'd eaten a bit every night or two, but it doesn't keep all that long - which was why I'd resisted it for a year or so - and that night, I'd eaten two large cubes.  I think it was all the sugar.  I don't normally eat much sugar and I think my blood sugar rushed up and then crashed.  Lesson learned.  I'd also learnt my lesson from the time I fainted at the top of the stairs.  Once I felt well enough to move, I crawled across the landing to my bedroom.

Of course, driving 350 miles the next day was not a good idea, so I waited, just in case it was something more than that and I was getting a virus of some sort - and decided to stay home.  I had written a lengthy to-do list and asked Wink to enquire pointedly about progress every day.  I've cracked on, too.  I've written the newsletter, emailed and booked a couple more speakers, emailed and confirmed arrangements with next week's speakers, written up the feedback for the last speaker.  I've emptied the L'toft china cabinets and sorted out the porcelain.  I'm in the process of emptying the two big bookcases in the study, in preparation for taking them upstairs - this is going to be quite a job, I'm not sure if it's possible without sawing one in half first.  I've chosen and paid for the kitchen flooring, which will be put in the study too as I'm opening up the doorway between that room and the kitchen.  I've got the kitchen units and worktop chosen and am waiting for the quote before ordering.  I've had a quote from the decorator and accepted it.  Weeza kindly came over yesterday to help me with the listed building form.  It's not finished, I still have some writing to do, to send to her, we need some info from the woodburner firm and she has photos and plans to upload.  

There's still a lot on the list, but none of this would have been done if I had gone away.  I'm sorry to say that I didn't tell Pam of my change of plans, as I'd then have found myself offering to take her to the hospital and, as she knew she'd have to make other arrangements, I've left it at that.  I won't tell her.  It'd hurt her feelings and I feel quite bad about it already.  I love her and Peter and I'm very willing to take her, but I needed time to get on with things.  I'm also busy next week, but I'll make time for them on Thursday, after going to the dentist.  

I finally let the chickens out today.  They could have gone out earlier, but one of Wink's chooks had, we're not sure how, managed to get out and she'd vanished.  We thought a fox must have got her.  But, several days later, she came back.  We think she'd laid an egg, sat on it and then was hungry so came for some food.  So it wasn't a daytime fox - but then we had rain and wind, so I left the girlies indoors.  Today, however, I opened the door of the run.  The six chickens in the run were thrilled and came out at once and I left the door open.  Eight more were in nest boxes, being lazy.  But later, when I went to check, four of those were outside too.  All but two came in at 5 o'clock and those were having such a lovely scratch in the compost heap that I left them.  The good girls came back a while later and all is well.  Scrabble is now over 10 years old and still looking fine.  She loves being hand-fed mealworms, but joins in with the others when I feed them treats and she is never picked on.  They're nice-natured bantams and don't bully old or weaker chickens although, if you watch for a while, you see there's a pecking order.  I make sure they all get their fair share. 

Z's trip is in the balance

 I'm struggling to take a week off, there's just so much to do.  I'll see how it goes.  I have made a list, so it may make more sense to stay and deal with it than to have it facing me on my return.

Of most concern at present is the lack of reply to three emails.  One is to the lecturer on Wednesday week, just to confirm arrangements.  The others are potential lecturers in October and December.  If they can't come, I need to find someone else fairly rapidly.  Or sometwo.  I'll give it one more day and send a polite nag.  I shouldn't have to.  I've rechecked their email addresses.  Even if they're on holiday, who doesn't check emails?  Or, if that's impossible, have an out of office reply?

Tomorrow, I'll continue to plod through my list.

Z makes quite vague plans, but they won't be vague for long

 I'm finally getting around to booking Nadfas speakers for the autumn.  I should have done this earlier, but going on holiday in late March scuppered me.  However, I'm sorted out now and have a few back-ups if anyone isn't free.  Once they're booked, I'll do next year until June, which is a priority for the next few weeks, then until the end of next year because I've got so many people I want - actually, I could easily book 20 people, but I only have 10 places a year.

Rose is coming over tomorrow, which will make Wince very happy as they're fond of each other and he misses her.  He has a dry sense of humour and they teased each other.  I'm sure nothing will have changed there.  I'm picking her up from the bus in Yagnub and she's planning to sort out the things I have stored for her, as she's expecting to move house quite soon. I hope she'll come to this year's blog party, but she's not sure at present.  The blog party will be in August, probably the 16th or the 23rd, but possibly a weekend either side.  I waited ages before planning it because I was waiting to hear from Ronan about holiday dates and now I'm checking with people who hope to come.  I'll confirm before long.  I don't think that any former bloggers read this blog but, of course, you're all welcome if you can make it to sunny south Norfolk and, if the date matters, let me know.  Nothing has been confirmed yet, but it will be soon.

As will my holiday next week, within 24 hours, I hope.  

Z is hopeful

 It must be said that Blogger is a blessed nuisance.  It always logs on with an email account that isn't my main one, so I have to alter it and then choose which blog I want to add to it.  When I have posted the update, it then reverts to the wrong account, so I have to change and sign in again if I want to reply to a comment.

You'd think that they're trying to kill blogging, innit?

Anyway, never mind,  It may be that, this time next week, I'll be in Scotland.  I hope so.  But, if the plans don't work out, they will do later in the year and I'll be in Wales instead next week.  I think Scotland, though.  Mostly, I want to go back to the Burrell Collection, near Glasgow.

Lovely Blue Witch has invited me to stay on the way north (worth going for this alone!) and then I hope to stay in Glasgow - I haven't booked a hotel yet, but there's availability - and then get about by public transport.  Then I hope to go north to visit friends in Fort William.  Their daughter and family live in Glasgow, so I hope to see them too.  But it's half term, so they might all be really busy and I won't know until Wednesday night or Thursday.  I'm relaxed.  It'll all work out.  If I end up visiting Scotland twice in a summer, then that seems a pretty good option too, as I love Scotland and haven't been there anywhere near as many times as I should in my fairly long life.

Z the former saver

 The house isn't falling apart of course, but it's not in its best shape.  Several rooms need redecorating and updating, especially the kitchen.  As soon as my children told me I need a new kitchen - that is, the next day - I went off to the kitchen company that my daughter used some years ago and is still pleased with and talked to Jonathan.  He came along, having made notes, to measure up.  We talked again and a week later I went to discuss his preliminary plans.  After a couple of hours, he had amended his drawings somewhat, I'd listened to him and he'd listened to me.

Since then, Al and family have helped me move furniture, including the dresser out of the kitchen.  Last night, I texted the joiner and the decorator and we're making some progress.  By Monday, I'll have spoken to the flooring company.  I hope to have tracked down the local kitchen fitter too.  Then I need to go back to the wallpaper company that I visited when I still thought I'd do some wallpapering myself.  It's not going to happen, which is a pity as I love wallpapering and do it perfectly.  The decorator has looked round and will send me a quote.

I'll probably use all my cash savings this year, but I'm relaxed about that.  My income is adequate and I've got more savings tied up.  I've never overspent in my life.

When I had my first Saturday job, my wages were less than £1 a day.  But this was 55 years ago and I was still at school and it wasn't unreasonable.  My wages went up by inflation plus an age-related increase every year, I had 2 paid weeks (single days, of course) a year plus all public holidays (the holiday was usually on a Monday but the library closed for the weekend).  I was very lucky, as I loved the job too.  Working with books, what could be better?

Anyway, it was just after my father died unexpectedly and, until the estate was sorted out, my mum was very short of money.  So, when I got my monthly pay cheque, the first thing I did was buy a treat.  It was usually food because, in the circumstances, that was more of a help than anything else.  No one suggested it, least of all my mother, who wouldn't have accepted money either.  I usually bought steak or grapes or something useful and normally unaffordable.  With the rest, I had a rule (I was an odd child).  Obviously, there were some unavoidable everyday expenses (though my mother kept me of course, I was a schoolchild and she paid for what I needed) but, if I wanted to buy clothes, for instance, then I wouldn't spend more than half my money.  If a dress cost £4 then I had to have £8.  In practice, I had to save up for three months for this, by which time I didn't want the dress any more.  So I bought books instead.

This was just my instinct, which I didn't tell anyone about, but it was surprisingly sensible, from a young woman who was quite immature and also in a state of shock.  1970 started dreadfully and just kept getting worse.  I suppose I was keeping myself together by self-control.  Anyway, it's stood me in good stead, because I knew from the start that I had to take responsibility for myself.  I was also a peculiar child and, now, I wish I'd been a bit more relaxed about life.  Poor kid.

Z takes control

 The title is nonsense of course, no control involved to speak of.  However, in relative terms, I'm less out of control.

I watched all 11+ hours of presentations and made notes on every one.  Quite brief ones, sometimes "too far" or "too dear" and once, "oh dear" but otherwise the cost of the lecture and an indication of my interest.  A few, I jotted down on a notepad as fairly definite.  Next, I need to bring them down to a shortlist to share with the committee and then, once they've been chosen, I start writing to ask if they're free when I want them to come.  At least it's all done by email nowadays and not telephone, which would be a trial.

Also, I've texted the local painter and decorator and he's coming over tomorrow afternoon to see what I want done.  A lot is the simple answer.  I've also texted the chap who I hope can do the kitchen window, but he's very busy and I just need to know.  Once I've got going with all that, I need to find another carpenter to do some cupboards and then a builder and a kitchen fitter and someone to do flooring and tiling (that may be the builder)...I can see why I've put off starting.  

I've got so much else on my plate, but all this had better come first.  I also want to fix the date of the blog party, which will be in August and I'm hoping to get away for the last week of this month, but before I decide about that, I have to email a couple of people.

There was a time when I would have just got on with it.  Now, it's enough to make me want to panic.  But it's all about self-control at the Zedery, innit?

Zoë has square eyes

 I probably have said, a while ago - but can't look it up because it's on the blog I can't get at for now - that I arrange the programme for our local branch of Nadfas.  While I was away in Mexico, the annual Directory Day took place.  There are a good many speakers who are registered to the society - they're all independent of it but, if accepted by an auditioning process, they go in the Directory and the programme secretary of each individual branch can book whoever they like for their annual programme.  I'm not sure if I've made that quite clear, but I hope you gather what I mean.

Anyway, it was an online process this time, which meant that they could take many more lecturers, over two days, each with two minutes to speak (the new lecturers get three minutes).  A total of 11 hour-long sessions, plus a few more who were added later.  I'm finally getting around to watching the entire process.  Of course, not all in one go, but I've seen 8 hours worth over two days and made notes on every single one.  In some cases, it's been simply 'too far' or 'too expensive' and never more than a sentence, but I'm doing the whole job conscientiously.  All this for nine lectures (I've already booked one).  In addition to typing the notes, I'm jotting down on paper the ones I think are definites and highlighting in red the typed ones I think I may look at again for my long list.

I'm really late with all this, I should have speakers booked up to Christmas (September to December) and only have the first one, as yet.  So, now I've started, I have to crack on.  I thought I might manage a final hour tonight, but it's nearly half past nine and, well, no.  I can manage another in the morning, maybe two.    It doesn't seem fair, not to watch everyone - there are more than 250 videos altogether.

So, that's what I've mostly been doing today.  I've got two computer monitors in front of me, so that I can watch the videos on one and look up the details of each speaker and make notes about them on the other.  With a pad of paper next to me, of course.  I'll finish watching on Wednesday and then get going with the choices.  It's no wonder I never watch television.

15, 16, maids in the kitchen

 Let's start with the kitchen - or rather, two days earlier.  I'd asked my children to come over without their families, not to leave anyone out but to minimise distraction.  We talked a bit and then the conversation turned to my future.  I'm 71 and I want to stay here until 2028, as that's the 100th anniversary of the Sage's parents buying this house.  After that, perhaps I should finally downsize?  Thing is, if I'm going to, I need to start preparing as there will be a lot to do and, unless there's a dire emergency, it can't be done in a year or so.

I've got a couple of friends now and I've always had friends, for years, whose families have recommended that they should move out, buy something smaller and more sensible and then they can enjoy their remaining years and they won't be a worry to those who love them.  But the families don't ever think it through.  If you've lived in the same house for decades, there's a lot of Stuff to consider.  It's daunting.  So is finding somewhere smaller, if you aren't ready for a retirement complex.  A nice 3 bedroom house with a manageable garden, room for your good (but unsaleable) Victorian furniture, the stairs not too steep, the garden just big enough - that's what the couples moving up from their starter homes want too, less the Victorian furniture.  So it's expensive, with selling your house that needs redecorating, getting house clearance people in because, though it breaks your heart, thousands of books and a good, solid table and chairs that no one wants and you won't have room for, the cost of moving, the stamp duty and so on - "just move' isn't helpful.

To my surprise, though I hadn't expected anyone except possibly Al to say that, I didn't really expect "don't move.'  But what when I die, I asked?  It'll be hell for you to sort out.  It was made fairly clear that their stress about me moving would be greater.  I can put in a lift, buy in help, get contractors to do the garden when Wince retires.  Not that any of this is imminent.  Oh, okay.  And, they all said, start with a new kitchen.

My kitchen has needed an upgrade for a long time.  But I couldn't face the disruption.  However, my children have spoken, so I have listened and acted.  There's an awful lot to do, I am not sure if I'm even capable of blogging the process.  But I've made a start and have got a handle on the basic design (I'm changing a lot.  Not the Aga but almost everything else is relocated or vastly altered).  I hope to have it done by November.

Z, always appreciating an oxymoron, is rigorously lazy

 Of course, mentioning the various things I want to write updates on, this is about none of them.

It's half past eight on Friday evening and I'm sitting in bed with my laptop, a cup of tea and a glass of iced water.  A couple of years ago, I fainted at the top of the stairs and woke up in the hallway.  Since then, I have been rigorously lazy after a blood donation.  I arrived home, went to give some food to the chickens (I had brought leftovers home from lunch, mostly pastry and bread), told the barn cats it was too early and went indoors.  

The tortoises had been living outside, but it's been so chilly and they'd just buried themselves, so they're having a few days of indoor comfort.  So I gave them a bit more food and then I went indoors and sat myself on the sofa with my feet up.  This was at 3pm and I've not done much, physically, since.  I've caught up on some paperwork, though.  And then Wink cooked my dinner and now, as I said, I'm in bed.  Not sleepy, but I'm not risking anything (I have to go and wash and clean my teeth, though).

While I was lounging, I heard a noise from upstairs.  The cat was on my lap and I couldn't tell what it was but, after a while, I suspected a pigeon down the chimney.  Indeed it was, daft thing.  Unhurt, but trapped.  I drew the curtains across every window but one, which I opened, but the tiny-brained creature flapped all over the room, crashing into ceiling and walls, rather than just following the light.  Eventually, by luck, it swooped out.  Last time, I had to trap it into a corner (a different bird, I presume) and pick it up.  I'm really glad I didn't come up and find it now, or else be woken at daybreak by it.  

This is the first time I've ever brought the laptop to bed.  I did bring my iPad occasionally, after Russell died, to watch a programme, but tv in bed has never been my thing.  Bed used to be for three things, now only for one, ie sleep (we won't count the wakeful hours in the night).  Which reminds me, I looked at the sleep app on my phone today, which takes its data from my watch.  My sleeping time has gone up over the past 23 days, to an average of 5 hours, 54 minutes a night.  From 2 hours 45 minutes over the 5 days before that.  However, looking back over the time I've had my watch, since September, some months I've even averaged 7 hours a night and I think that's pretty good.  

Sorry

 I'm here, still alive and well.  It's just busy at the Zedery.

I will have to write some catch-up posts, there's been a lot happening since I was a proper blogger.  Even today, I have to go out in half an hour for a meeting, followed by a drive to Norwich to meet Rose for lunch, then on to take Wink to a hospital appointment.  By the time I come home, it'll be time to catch up with household stuff and animal stuff, then I'll be tired.  

Being tired in the evenings has absolutely scuppered my ability to do anything much.  It's a nuisance.  I seem to be unable to help it. I'm fine in the day.  I won't get into the way of dozing off in front of the tv, though.  I'm not that old.

So, things to write about include:

Tortoises updates

Kitchen news

Lowestoft china news (this is about buying it, which has happened more than I expected)

Visits to London.

It's fine to nag.  It's about the only thing that spurs me to action.

Now, I must plug the computer in for a bit before taking it to the meeting, because I write the minutes.