I'm not feeling very capable of describing how I feel. There's too much that I'm not at liberty to say. Suffice it to say that the Head and I evidently haven't handled things too well, because our wonderful and dedicated teachers are feeling really anxious, the Sage hasn't altogether behaved like one, and my car wouldn't start this morning. That's without the rest of the stuff patiently waiting.
Do you know, cooking dinner this evening, I suddenly thought, thank goodness I'm a Christian boozer and I have something to fall back and land on? What does a teetotal atheist do? Shit still happens, for goodness sake. Resilience can only go so far. Crunchy raw carrots are delicious, but don't cut the mustard. Seriously, I'm interested. If you have an answer, please tell me. Because I may give up the booze one day, you never know, and who knows with faith? I don't think I'm the sort to lose it because I'm the tenacious sort, but shit happens.
I'm sorry my loves, I know that this is a positive, forward thinking and cheerful blog, but it's also an honest one, and I'm having a day when I'm not feeling negative, not unhappy, but it's all too much. I don't have to cope every day.
Okay, the good things. The Sage was great, I called him when he was asleep to say the car wouldn't start, and he uncomplainingly was ready to drive me in within five minutes. I said what I needed to, and I feel able to cope with it. I've had a kind discussion over the Sage's screw-up and the result is his decision. The car is back now, it's nothing major. I've not let anyone down. I slept last night for more than six hours. My friend Mike came to my rescue over the car, and I had a good chat with his wife Ann (not you, Mike and Ann, darlings) and cuddled their dogs (they've got an adorable spaniel cross that I'd bring home right now) and admired photos of their cute granddaughter. I received my quote for my car insurance today, and it's not much more than last year, which means I'm comfortable to just accept it and not go through the shopping around hell (I'll check the small print first). I've got money in the bank and had a really helpful, though unsolicited, phone call to advise me on where to put it (ooer missus).
So, good way outweighs bad. That it doesn't feel that way is just one of those things. I'll be back tomorrow being frivolous.
Oh, and thanks, Dave. Your remark on Facebook today had me laughing for quite some time. I L'edOL.