Monday, 7 July 2008

The woman's a fool

I've been giving tips to the Sage on how to win an argument and look good too - that is, not appear to play dirty.

I don't know whether to hope he's taken it in or not. If he has, I'll have to up my game somewhat.

I'll still outdebate him though. I've got more on my side than words.

30 comments:

Dandelion said...

Why?

Dave said...

Oooh, Dandy's back! And commenting on your blog. Lucky you, z.

Z said...

Why am I a fool? Because it's taken me years to perfect the craft of out-arguing my husband, and now I've told him how it's done.

Brom said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Brom said...

There is more to this - you wouldn't be that stupid?

excuse deleted post, I had an argument with a "t"

Brom said...

Deleted posts are OK though... as they give you a higher comment count.

Oh, like this one did..

Dave said...

But z isn't the sort of person who would delight in high comment counts.

On her blog, or anyone else's.

Dave said...

A man asked his wife: "If you could have anything in the world for one day, what would you want?"

Dave said...

"I'd love to be ten again," she replied.

Dave said...

On the morning of her birthday, he got her up bright and early and off they went to a local theme park. What a day! He put her on every ride in the park: the Death Slide, the Screaming Loop, and the Wall of Fear, everything there was! Wow! Five hours later she staggered out of the theme park, her head reeling and her stomach upside down. Off to McDonald's they went, where her husband ordered her a Big Mac along with large fries and a refreshing coke. Then it was off to a film: the latest Hollywood blockbuster, hot dogs, popcorn, Pepsi Cola. What a fabulous adventure! Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed. He leaned over and lovingly asked, "Well dear, what was it like being ten again?"

Dave said...

One eye opened. "I meant my dress size."

Dandelion said...

Not why are you a fool, z, but why did you give away your secret?

Up until now, you had three things going for you. Now, one of the things you had going for you is gone!

Dandelion said...

In other words, what brom said.

Dave said...

*Waves at Dandy, as she doesn't seem to be speaking to him*

Wink said...

Honestly, why haven't you shared your innermost secrets with your sister - although if I'm not very much mistaken it's to keep the edge over me!

peaceableimperatrix said...

My question is "why?", too. But in the "What has happened to urge you to teach the Sage how to do this?" There has got to be a back-story to this post...

martina said...

So long as he doesn't use these newly acquired skills on you!

Z said...

Wink, you don't need advice.

A meeting is coming up where the chairman may be trying to push through a proposal, having (it seems) done much of the negotiation with a third party in advance, and the Sage is against it. He was, I could see, going to make a big thing about the incorrect procedure, but he mainly has hearsay evidence of that and besides, it's the eventual outcome that matters. I advised that he focus on specific matters (slipping a couple of sneaky ecological ones while I was about it to strengthen his case) where he knew his facts and they couldn't be disputed, not to be sidetracked, and to listen with an open mind in case the proposal makes more sense than he thinks it does.

So now you all know how to do it, none of you will ever lose an argument again. Oh, and don't take it personally or lose your temper of course.

Dave, thank you for the joke. I ROLF again.

Z said...

I mean ROFL of course.

Z said...

Three things, Dandelion? Three?

Dandelion said...

Not any more, z. Not any more.

Dave said...

Methinks she's being enigmatic to tease you, z, for your naughtiness while she was away.

Z said...

But only three?

I'd go and ask the Sage, but he'd only chuckle and not reply (men are so concerned not to say the wrong thing that they prefer not to say anything at all in these instances).

luckyzmom said...

Thanks for sharing the sage tips you gave to the Sage. I hope we all are able to use it wisely. Not making it personal is difficult to overcome.

PS I have posted a meme that I started several months ago.

Z said...

But then you get upset and you lose the argument. Don't let an upsetting personal remark by, if it's meant to hurt, remark on it but if you let the argument become about the insult or slight, you lose the focus. And never say "you never" or " you always" because it's hardly ever precisely true, and a triumphant "last Christmas!", even if that was 11 months ago, weakens your case because it looks as if you were exaggerating.

Seriously, I'm a good arguer. If I lose it's because you've convinced me you're right and then I'll say so.

Gordie said...

I agree that it's not a good idea to rely on hearsay evidence, In a committee meeting, it's important to lead with your strongest arguments, to win the support of others in the room.

I'm surprised to learn this is also your perfected craft for winning arguments in your marriage. My memory of married life is that my spouse would assert things that were unverifiable, and not linked to evidence.

I suppose my question is - if you have shared some secret knowledge with the Sage, won't you both be better off for being more articulate and better listeners?

Z said...

Darling Gordie, your 'memory of married life' suggests that you aren't married any longer, so your wife's methods maybe didn't resolve friction but caused resentment? Winning an argument without having a row is better than scoring points and leaving things unresolved. If there's a let-out, he'll take it, which means that saying something unverifiable won't do.

Cows out, I must go and do something.

Gordie said...

Oh Z, I really don't think I praised you anything like as much as I should have! Your style of argument sounds extremely mature and respectful and assertive, and I wholeheartedly agree with it. That's why I arched a verbal eyebrow at you calling yourself a fool.

And you're right: I am no longer with the first Mrs Gordie. But not cynical about love, or short of it. And "cows out!" is such a marvellous utterance. Thank you.

Z said...

I rather love 'arched a verbal eyebrow'. And you're right. I am happy for the Sage to argue with equal strength and persuasiveness. Or more, indeed. Then I have the opportunity to praise him for being masterful...;-)

The cows really were out. I had to help put them back in the field.

Gordie said...

I was thinking of Roger Moore, in The Saint.