Wednesday, 6 December 2006

Strutting their Stuff

At last night's dinner, I sat obliquely opposite *Dawn*, whom I've known slightly for several years but not got to know very well. She seemed to know about me, however, within minutes she was teasingly remarking on my liking for a drink or two...look, really, I don't get this, I really have never fallen over or become truly embarrassing through drink. I am a regular moderate drinker (okay, those awfully tightlaced types who think that anything over 10 units per week is a bit dodgy might call it more than moderate, but they all weigh less than 110 pounds and are thinking of what is appropriate for themselves) and I am also a person who is only truly awake in the evenings - those of you who have only met me during the day have not received the full esprit de Z - (so help me, this sentence is becoming truly convoluted, are you losing the thread yet?) but that is no reason for the reputation I seem to have as a frightful tippler who is never happy without a drink in her hand. The only consolation is that everyone feels able to tease me about it, so I must be spoken of as a sot, but a good-natured one.

Anyway, I had a chance to chat to *Dawn*. She is lovely and I love to hear people talking about their enthusiasms. She mentioned she is going to Stafford for a big chicken competition so I encouraged her to tell me about them. It transpired that she has, this year, started entering her chickens into shows and has done extremely well. She said that it had taken her years to work up to first prizes with her goats, but she is already winning trophies with the chooks. Apparently, they particularly enjoy their pre-show bath; she uses a maximum-shine shampoo she buys from her hairdresser (she has lovely hair herself) and puts them on a wheat and corn mix for a week after the bath, to stiffen up their droppings so that they don't dirty themselves before their big day.

I wonder if she has to lead them round the showground, like they do at Crufts.

8 comments:

Pat said...

'Stiffen up their droppings.'
Thanks for that ducks! when I was your age I drank much more than I do now but wouldn't give up my daily snifter for anything. I was once told I fly to the theatre bar like a homing pigeon!

Z said...

Well, we were all a bit surprised. Apparently, they usually eat layer pellets, but that makes them a bit loose.

Yes, a good subject for dinnertime conversation. I didn't eat the redcurrants decorating my dessert.....

Anonymous said...

And I thought grooming standard poodles was a lot of work... Thankfully I don't feed them shampoo with kibble.

Wendz in France said...

What an unusual passion to have....chickens! I can't imagine getting excited about something I like to stuff and roast - unless it's to eat of course. Give me a good chicken recipe and I'm all ears.

Yesterday someone asked me how much I drink..I said usually a glass or two at night. She was very concerned and asked me if I was able to get through an evening without having a drink.

stitchwort said...

It could catch on at the hairdresser - shampoo, set, and "something to stiffen the droppings"?

Z said...

A variation from the barber's "Something for the weekend, sir?"

jen said...

within minutes she knew you were a drunken sailor....

good for you.

Z said...

Put her in the scuppers with a hosepipe on her, er-lie in the morning.

For such, lamentably, is my fate.